I get in moods where I just want to get rid of all the extra things and stuff I have accumulated. I feel the weight of all the excess, and I want to simplify, clear out, and clean out. I moved to North Carolina just over 4 years ago. Preparing for that move meant getting rid of a lot. I only took with me what would fit in my Trailblazer.

Since that move from Nebraska to North Carolina, I've moved a total of nine times! Yes, nine. There was no intention of moving after that initial move, but life happens and circumstances change.

I just passed the year mark of living at my current place. A year! It is the longest I have lived in one place during the last four years.

The suicide of Stephen “tWitch” Boss has caused some good discussion about mental health, suicide, and how someone’s life can look so perfect on the outside but be far from perfect on the inside.

What made the news more shocking was that tWitch appeared to have it all – a happy, positive, beautiful life. I didn’t follow his career, but I knew who he was from The Ellen DeGeneres Show. He was so likable, and I, like many others, felt we got to know him a bit during his time on Ellen.

Suicide is so misunderstood, and it’s something you can’t have a conversation about after the fact. No one can reflect on the day and tell you what they were going through that led to their death. It’s too late. The signs don’t matter. The reason doesn’t matter. It’s often viewed as a selfish act, and I could not disagree more.

Writing a book has always been a goal of mine. I didn’t necessarily decide one day that I wanted to write a book, but it was more of a feeling, a knowing – I felt that someday my experiences would help others as they go through similar situations. I don’t recall when this feeling first surfaced, but if I had to guess, I would say probably in my early thirties. That feeling has stayed with me, and I’ve never brushed it off as a pipe dream or fantasy; I knew it would happen someday. When and about what were the only unknowns.

I’ve had a file on my computer named ‘book’ for many years where I would keep different things I had written over the years, not necessarily written to be used as part of a book but written for other purposes. I would go through those files every once in a while, but they were random, and nothing made sense to come together as a book. Nonetheless, I was never discouraged and knew that someday, something would spark.

"The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty." – Winston Churchill

When faced with a problem, an optimist starts figuring out ways to solve it or turn the experience into a positive one. A pessimist, however, will grumble and moan about whatever they see as wrong with the given situation.

According to the world's foremost expert on optimism, Dr. Martin Seligman, everyone is born optimistic. And yet, 95% of adults are pessimists, not optimists. What goes wrong? Some people see the glass as half empty. Others see it as half full.

Your mindset is the biggest influence on your viewpoint. If you are determined to make something happen, changes are more likely it will. Likewise, if you tell yourself you can't, I promise you, you won't!

We all have an ideal version of ourselves that we aspire to be. Maybe you want to be thinner, richer, or more successful. Or, maybe you just want to be happier and more fulfilled. Whatever it is, there's often a disconnect between who we are and who we want to be. This gap is what psychologist Dan McAdams calls "the authentic self." So, what exactly is the authentic self, and why is it important?

Keep reading to find out.

What Is the Authentic Self?

The authentic self is your true identity—who you are at your core. It includes your values, beliefs, and motivations. Importantly, it's also dynamic, which means it can change over time as you grow and evolve. Unfortunately, many of us never take the time to get in touch with our authentic selves. We allow our lives to be controlled by outside forces like our jobs, families, and society. As a result, we end up living inauthentic lives that aren't aligned with our true desires and passions.

My goal here is to support, inspire, and encourage free-spirited women.

 Have you ever said:

•  “I feel so unfulfilled in life. There has to be something more.”

• “I’m restless and want to go on adventures.”

• “I feel so tired and have no energy because nothing I do gets me excited.”

• “I want out of this cage and to feel free!”

• “I can’t wait until the day I can finally live my dreams.”

• “I just don’t fit into these social norms.”

If you have ever had these thoughts, then you are in the right place!